When I imagined 30, I now realize it was with the viewpoint of societal and family expectations.
Thirty was meant to be an age I would have it all and be so much, but instead i’m still just trying to figure life out. Anyone else? As my therapist would remind us, THAT’S OKAY.
I had this big picture of where I would be at and where I am is so far from it:
| What I expected | Where I’m at |
| To buy my own house | Buying journals, plants and still renting an apartment |
| Growing a family | Growing my mindset & being the best aunt I can be. To be honest I’m not even sure if I want kids. |
| Climbing the corporate ladder | Working to live instead of living to work. Taking more time for me and climbing into bed early AF |
| Important job title | Not worrying about job titles – of course this is easier said than done but I know my life is more important than my job |
| Having everything I want | Having all the therapy I need |
| Multiple investments (aka, being great with money) | Still figuring out money management and mostly investing in my mental health. Yes, I need to work on this but don’t we all have an area we con improve on? I have 60 more years to figure this out! |
| Having the same large group of friends I’ve always had | Releasing friends and accepting that some come into your life for certain periods of time has been an important lesson to me. Now I have a small group of friends that I can fully trust, understand and respect my boundaries and that I appreciate so much. |
| Living the life | Living my life imperfectly, just trying to get by, somedays thriving and somedays surviving. Journeying through mental illness and body acceptance like I never expected, who knew this could be so tough?! |
Summary, I’ve met pretty much none of the expectations that were set for me but I’d say I’m still living a pretty great life and very grateful for making it to 30. There were many years I didn’t think I would.
So if you’re feeling like you can never meet your expectations, reevaluate them to see if they are truly yours or just the ones society and family set for you.
We can make it through another year, and how about another 30?! I sure hope so!
Reminder, if you’re in crisis
Call: Crisis Services Hotline available 24/7: 1-844-437-3247 OR 911
Text: 45645, 4 PM – 12 AM ET
Go to the hospital nearest you
<3 Meg
